The latest from acting class and a guy named "Jake"

Next week is the last of my improv classes for this session. I didn't find this session quite as enjoyable as the first . . . we didn't get to do quite as much. But, it was still helpful. And I really love the other students. I love the diversity of ages, professions . . . it's a really cool and fun group. I had a little bit of a disappointment today though . . . There's a guy in the class who's about my age. He's a really nice guy and extremely buff (he's a personal trainer). From his appearance you wouldn't think it, but he's actually quite an introvert. We went to the same school for undergrad and we're both at stages in our lives where we're evaluating what we want the rest of our lives to look like. Consequently we had some good conversations after a couple classes. Since we park in the same location, we made it a point a couple times to walk back together so we can chat. Tonight he didn't wait . . . he knew I was coming out right behind him and he left anyway . . . Now there could be a million simple reasons for that. Maybe he had somewhere he needed to be. Maybe he has other things on his mind (hard to tell with him, he doesn't participate much in class and his shy nature makes him somewhat mysterious). Whatever the case may be, it definitely elicited a bit of an emotional response from me. Why should I take such a thing personally? And show of hands . . . how many would take this reaction as a sign of gayness, just wondering :-)

I also had a nice thing happen though. The person I DID talk to after class was an older guy, a lawyer probably in his late fifties/early sixties. He's really into acting and writing. He complemented me on my performance in one of the improv activities, said I had a good mind for it and asked if I'd ever been into writing or if I was planning to continue with acting. I do plan to continue with improv at least, in some capacity. Maybe take another class in the summer or try out for a local troupe or something. Or maybe just join a club when I continue my education. In any case, it was nice to be complemented. I realize that I seem to have a hard time recognizing when I'm good at something unless someone else tells me I am.  That's what being overly modest and self-critical does to you, I guess.

I've been corresponding further with the Aussie Guy. Let's give him a name, how about Jake, that sounds like an Australian name, haha.  He seems really cool, I like him!  Now, in his latest email he asked me the dreaded question . . . "how long have you been out?" That's kind of my fault, I had asked him a question based on something he said in a previous email, and it kind of led to him asking me this. I'll tell him the truth, and I don't expect he'll have a problem with it since he came out relatively recently himself. Basically, I'm as good as out to my three cousins, my mom, and my friend (Janice). I'm on the verge of telling at least two other friends. If I actually find a guy I like and start dating him, there's nothing stopping me from going further other than nerves. And I know you all will help me with that problem, won't you? Encouraging energy, everyone.  :-)