Update

Quick update, because I never like to leave a super emotional post as the most recent one for long :-)

I'm feeling better today. I slept in super late, which I think I really needed. Sleep really does heal.

When I logged on I noticed the anonymous comment on the last entry. I appreciate it, and yes I agree that I was (am) too hung up on being friends with Ben. I disagree that the goal of being friends is "clearly ridiculous" though. It has hit a snag, mostly because I tried to rush the process. But I'm confident it will happen some day. Call me stubborn, I don't care :-) fan of casey is right though . . . I have to resist my normal tendency to be proactive and instead just go with the flow and let things happen in their own time. So yes I agree that I need to cut Ben out of my life. But I do not agree that it has to be forever, that I should write him off completely.

I know it's bad that I'm down on myself. I know there will be others that I will really like, other relationships. I guess I'm just paranoid of this happening again. My scientific mind keeps searching for the reason why this happened to prevent history from repeating itself.

In other news, I'm up in LA this weekend hanging out with my cousin Roger. About to go to a party, then tomorrow I'll meet up with my new gay friend that I met the last time I was in LA.

Until next time!