Ben responded to my email.
He (implicitly) declined the opportunity to meet in person to talk more, as I expected he would. He did read and consider all of my points, and clarified his position. He apologized for how quickly this happened on my end of things, but stated that the absence of romantic feelings on his part was no place to build a lasting relationship from. I suppose it's more than just butterflies he's looking for.
He reiterated how much he gained from our relationship, what an amazing person I am, and how he'd like to be friends if it is possible. He wished me luck in finding someone who can reciprocate my feelings.
Well, I feel a little bit more at peace now. Even though it wasn't in person, we are leaving things on a bit better terms than before. I am saddened and frustrated that my great success of winning Ben over was ultimately illusory, but there's nothing I nor he can do about that. As perfect as he seemed for me, that perfection was also illusory because a crucial element was missing below the surface, like a house with a weak foundation (to borrow a metaphor from him).
Also, thanks to TwoLives for that comment in the last entry. I do know that Ben's mind is totally made up. While I do hope that with time he realizes what a good thing he gave up, I also know not to hold my breath.
Que sera, sera.
2 comments:
You have to give it some time and give Ben some space to consider what's happened here. It's too quick for him to reconsider what he's missing.
As for staying friends, that's the best outcome but tricky to pull off. Staying friends could delay you from moving on, especially if you are more emotionally invested in him than he in you. You may continue to wait for a rekindling that may never come.
Hopefully his response answered some of your more pressing questions about why and provide a bit of closure so you can move on to see how your relationship with him transforms.
I wish you both the best. Staying friends can be tough but hopefully everything will work out for the best. *Hugs*
Post a Comment