Today's song is "Talk." Because it seems a theme over this entry is conversation. Specifically, a somewhat slow conversation, a great natural conversation . . . and an upcoming uncomfortable conversation.
Today I met up with Jake for the first time since our first meeting. We saw "Cabin in the Woods" which is a crazy movie. I'm a big Joss Whedon fan and he helped write it, plus I'm a big Chris Hemsworth fan too (and he was HOT in this movie). Afterward we chatted a bit about our exploits in the online dating world. I told him about my interesting situation dating both Aaron and his ex-boyfriend, he got a kick out of that. It's strange though . . . now that I'm far removed from the emotional highs of our initial correspondence I realize that Jake and I really don't have super great chemistry. Too many awkward lapses in the conversation, and I felt like I was doing most of the work of keeping it going. I still like him as a friend though, and definitely plan to hang out with him again sometime.
It's different with Ben. I left him a message today and he called back after the movie. We talked on the phone for 40 minutes. Talking to him is very natural. I think I'll go up to LA again next weekend, I definitely want to hang out with him again. He even offered to come down to my area to hang out again, which I thought was really nice of him. After talking on the phone with him today, the glimmer of hope that we could start dating again at some point down the road was strengthened a bit. And even if that didn't happen, I can see us becoming really good friends.
Meanwhile I'm hiking with Aaron tomorrow. I know I probably shouldn't put too much weight in what his ex-boyfriend said about him (clingy, needy), but admittedly it does make me kind of cautious about going any further with him. It sucks . . . I like him just fine. He's a nice guy, and kind of cute. But I'm not really getting relationship-level attraction vibes from him (especially not while my mind is on Ben, haha). So I guess I'll need to have the "friend talk" tomorrow, which I've never given to anyone before. I hope he takes it alright. Then there's the question of whether and how I should remain friends with both him and his ex-bf! Neither knows that I've dated the other one. What kind of crazy reality show did I wind up in?
2 comments:
You have kept an open mind about most of the guys you have dated, so don't let someone else's opinion color your own too much. Decide for yourself whether he is too "needy/clingy" rather than rely on a 3rd party's assessment. Your tolerance may be entirely different. I tend to think that if someone is needy/clingy that's part of their personality, so you will see it whether the relationship is dating or platonic friendship.
Agree with the above. Don't let someone else's opinion of Aaron affect your own judgment of him. Everyone has a different perspective and interacts with each other differently.
No need to mention that you had a date with his ex so soon. ;-)
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